Couples Therapy
I work with couples in various stages of their relationship whether dating, engaged or married. Clients I’ve worked with have dealt with issues of communication problems, infidelity, dealing with sexual problems, dealing with history of abuse and trauma, parenting issues, learning how to get their needs met, parenting problems, preparing and adjusting to having children. I hold advance training and continue with consultation in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFCT), which his an evidence based treatment that is based on an adult theory of love related to attachment. When couples disagree, most repeat the following disruptive pattern: blame, criticize, defend, express contempt, distance, and emotionally or physically withdraw. Distress is not about how many fights you have or even if you resolve the fights. Distress is about how you fight, and whether you can retain some sort of emotional connection after the fight. When a couple has a secure attachment, they feel their partner is responsive, which means they can talk about anything and they will come out of the conversation closer, rather than farther away. In turn, another element of secure attachment is feeling that our partner loves, accepts and respects us. When those two elements are there, couples tend to not miss each other and where sometimes arguments escalate. They can build trust and secure a base they can each rely on. Through EFT, we are able to identify this cycle of communication and strength the relationship to regain a sense of love and admiration for and from our partners. Additionally, I have been trained in Gottman Method Couples Therapy (level 1 and 2).